dog dumps on coffee house floor, i go apeshit

6.4.09

It’s no secret that San Diego is a dog friendly town. But these days, shit’s getting out of control- literally. This blog comes as a response to a dog taking a crap on coffee house floor just feet from where i sat. Gross, right? Rounding a corner at Border’s Books, shoe shopping at Nordy’s, and yes, drinking a beer at some of my favorite local bars, all too often i come across dogs where they DO NOT BELONG. So let me ask you this: What is the difference between a woman accompanied by her pooch, and a man puffing on a cigarette, inside a public business? Both pose health risks, right? A dog bite might not cause cancer, but i hear rabies is a bitch, as are the painful series of abdominal shots one must get to avoid an Old Yeller-like demise. A less extreme analogy: people have a right to breathe smoke-free air, and i’d like to think that these rights extend to people with animal allergies. i also think that given these ‘tough economic times’ it would really suck for a ‘dog-friendly’ establishment to get slapped with a health code violation, or worse- shut down because an animal related incident occurred on their premises. Dogs are the new children, and somehow this insane notion has become socially acceptable. Is this a case of tolerant business owners being taken advantage of by irresponsible dog owners ? (i.e. cool if you patronize with leashed dog in a timely manner, not so cool if you lounge around with your mutt and treat the place like it’s your living room)…

Here’s the tale of one bad parent. Laugh about it, it’s all you can do, but i hope you can sniff out the bigger issue(s). Fucking stinks in my opinion!

Says the barista, ‘excuse me, mam, your dog just messed the floor over there.’ i looked up from my laptop monitor to observe the scene.

The woman was creaming her tea far from where the dog unloaded.

‘No!’ said the woman in a loud, British accent. ‘Oh, dear, Shadow!’ she confronted the dog. ‘Shadow! You have been a bad, bad dog! How could you, Shadow?’ She went on.

‘I am so sorry- I had no idea!’ she blabbered on, dragging the medium-sized dog behind her towards the dump-site.

‘Would you like a bag to pick that up?’ the barista put one on the counter. All the while this old bat scolded her dog, ‘No, bad, NO! SHADOW, how could you do this!!??’

The woman did her best to scoop the load into the baggie. Now because this woman had her tea, personal items and dog on a leash, the only place to put the bag of shit was on the pastry counter. She was extremely fast about getting herself situated, and was right to scold the dog loudly at least 2 more times. The shit bag was promptly removed from the counter after approximately 30 seconds.

Madame and Shadow took a seat on the patio to continue their afternoon tea party. When she pulled Shadow onto her lap for a cuddle, i couldn’t resist the call of my digi-cam.

Madame’s blatant disregard for her fine white trousers was disturbing to say the least. i could tell by the smell wafting through the coffee shop that this poo was a wet one. Did she wipe Shadow’s backside at the creamer station? The kind North Parkian (totally on meth) also photographed here was quite fond of the dog, bouncing from side to side, taunting and slapping it playfully, all the while Shadow’s ass skidded across Madame’s leg and crotch region. (due to a shaky camera hand, the photo did not process. sorry.)

Madame and Sir North Park had such a lovely time, they exchanged numbers. As she approached the doorway to return her tea cup, the barista barked, ‘Mam, do NOT bring your dog back in here.’ (likely unhappy that he handwiped Shadow’s poo from the floor). Walking to the counter, Shadow in tow, she said over and over, ‘I am so sorry. It will not happen again!’

If you see this woman and her dog, watch you shoes and nearby belongings. The mutt has no sphincter control and could go anywhere.

15 Responses to “dog dumps on coffee house floor, i go apeshit”

Matt Says:
June 4th, 2009 at 1:02 pm
Amy, once again you’re on crack. If you don’t like dogs, don’t go to places that allow them. Your reference to a “public business” in your blog above is interesting.

Business, unless run by the government, are private and if business owners wish to allow dogs into their place of business, as long as they aren’t violating the law, they’re completely allowed to.

Your anger at the dog is misguided too. Your anger should be directed towards the owner and not the dog. If a dog thinks it’s perfectly acceptable to do its business wherever it pleases, that’s the owner’s fault, not the dog’s.

You need better things to write about!
poop chute Says:
June 4th, 2009 at 1:21 pm
Dear Saysgranite,

since you so careless deleted my last post which I felt was due to your error. I shall once again type out my poignant words, “Dude, they are totally going to bone.”

Sincerely yours,
Poopchute
Jeff Says:
June 4th, 2009 at 1:41 pm
Matt,

You’re right that it’s the owner’s responsibility ultimately. But if owners are being so careless that they allow dogs with IBS, or as I’ve seen in a few local establishments, overly aggressive dogs, into their places, it begins to be a problem that the venue needs to address. I honestly find little more annoying than people who overstep the boundries of where dogs should and should not be. And I don’t dislike dogs, on the contrary, I love my dog. I just know that, as a dog owner, she stays at home when we go to the grocery store, or if I’m out with her, I tie her to a post while I go get a cup of coffee.

There’s a sense of entitlement I think a lot of dog owners have because they love their dog to the degree that they think their dog is above the rules.

And I also disagree that Amy needs something better to write about. This is a pretty hot issue, and I’d imagine it’s going to spark a fairly decent discussion.
admin Says:
June 4th, 2009 at 1:50 pm
Matt,

As Whitney Houston so eloquently put it: ‘crack is whack.’

I was not on drugs when I wrote this blog. When I said ‘public business’ it was to emphasize that not ‘everyone’(in public, that is) welcomes the sight of dogs or other pets, for that matter.

I understand that while it might not be illegal to allow dogs in places of commerce, it does in fact create a great liability for the business owner, and its patrons. For instance, my Mom is so highly allergic to dogs she will launch into a fit of snotty sneezes if in the same space as a dog. I’ll agree she should avoid Petco, pet stores or dog parks- but why the hell should she have to worry about patronizing a bar, coffee house, restaurant or department store?

What if someone trips over a dog?

Is it really sanitary for a dog’s ass to rub a restaurant’s bench seat where a toddler, or anyone for that matter, goes to sit next?

I don’t believe I showed anger toward the dog in this blog post. If I did, my sincerest apologies to you, Shadow.

granite.
poop chute Says:
June 4th, 2009 at 3:16 pm
You are all missing the point.

That tweaker is probably going to do her for a quad of the white stuff. That’s “meth” to you.
poop chute Says:
June 4th, 2009 at 3:41 pm
Dear Saysgranite,

I see a question in your response to “Matt” where you state, “Is it really sanitary for a dog’s ass to rub a restaurant’s bench seat where a toddler, or anyone for that matter, goes to sit next?” I feel this is a valid point and have come up with a scientific method in order to ease your mind.

There is an experiment that can be undertaken in order to verify that since dogs/cats/etc have no gluteal muscles that they do indeed rub their bare “o-rings” everywhere they sit. While this may seem comfortable to them as it must have a nice cooling effect on their anus it is without a doubt disquieting to the animals two legged friends.

My experiment is rather simple. First catch several specimens of different weights to account for different sized “butt cheeks” they may have. Second go to CVS and pick up the following supplies: alcohol (beer or wine), several large white rectangular pieces of construction paper (one per specimen), a sharpie, and lipstick. When you are at home start drinking alcohol, lay paper on the ground, catch specimen, carefully apply lipstick to anus. Observe meanwhile noting any stray lipstick marks on the construction paper.

I believe this experiment will relieve you of any stress as to whether or not animal ass is rubbing everywhere.

Yours always,
Poopchute
Edwin Says:
June 4th, 2009 at 6:33 pm
When will it end? When can I bring my ferret or cat or llama to the local brew pub? I, too, don’t mind dogs, and if I had a yard, would have one. But this is getting a bit ridiculous.

Dog owners are a militant and territorial lot. I would rather go against the NRA then to try to take away a dog friendly park.

I can’t go to the mall without seeing people with dogs. I can’t go to a bar without seeing a pooch. I know of coffeehouses, and restos and other establishments that allow dogs. All well and good, until someone gets maimed, attacked or shit on. This is a bit too much, in my opinion.

I actually had a conversation with a friend last night about this, and essentially had to cut the conversation off lest brawled to the death.
Liz Says:
June 4th, 2009 at 9:42 pm
Amy, kudos to you for writing the “pet-unfriendly” perspective. I completely agree with you – dogs, no matter how well-loved, do not belong in public spaces like restaurants, bars, grocery stores, etc. We can’t tell people to leave their kids at home, and as pets are increasingly seen as replacement children by both their owners and society, we are running into to sticky (or at the very least smelly) situations. Frankly, I should only be expected to put up with the unsanitary and annoying antics of my own species when in non-pet-specific areas.
Mel Says:
June 4th, 2009 at 11:10 pm
I love dogs. I am obsessed with mine. However, I’d be pretty pissed if one dropped a steaming pile in the middle of an establishment while I was trying to enjoy a beverage and relax.

I didn’t see any hostility toward the dog in this post, just the crazy owner.
Caroline Says:
June 5th, 2009 at 12:39 am
What about the human shit that graced the delivery entrance and the emergency exit of the Hillcrest Rite Aid for about 6 weeks? Disgusting. I jog by there almost everyday, and last week I finally had enough and talked to the manager. They have removed it since, but I can’t believe that it was there for such a long time. Whether it’s canine or human, public poop is a bummer.

Congrats on getting your “Beer Wars” article published!
Doglover Says:
June 5th, 2009 at 3:27 pm
If your business serves food, it must adhere to Health Codes. A business that is not up to code can be shut down. This woman had no business bringing her dog into a coffee house that serves food unless it is a service dog. Period. I know many businesses are being lax on this. But businesses that serve food can be fined for this. This woman’s blatant disregard for this business’ lively hood was very selfish. And you all need to lighten up. This story is gross and very very FUNNY. North Park and Normal Heights have ALWAYS had a rep for colorful people and this story is no exception.

Thanks for the pics of the perp Granite!
Em Says:
June 5th, 2009 at 4:10 pm
As someone with dog allergies, do I get to maintain a sense of entitlement too? One where I should be allowed to enter a coffee shop, get a cup of coffee and leave without fear of death? True, I can opt to avoid dog friendly establishments, and for the most part I do – or I avoid the dog friendly patios many places have and opt to sit inside in relative comfort. Unfortunately, though, many establishments aren’t so open about their dog friendly nature. I knew that dogs were welcome outside this shop, for example, but would not have expected to see them inside.
Gladys Says:
June 9th, 2009 at 7:18 pm
@Matt: Since when is a business private? Sure most businesses are privately-owned, yet since they serve the PUBLIC, they should adhere to guidelines and regulations.

Do you think this cafe would receive an A rating from the county if they saw dog hair or actual feces in the establishment?
josh granite Says:
June 11th, 2009 at 4:51 pm
amy, you and i are one-in-the-same!! this article will forever be near and dear to my heart, not just because you’re my big sis’ but because i too strongly dislike those k-9 sons-a-bitches
Edwin Says:
June 11th, 2009 at 5:54 pm
Spoken like a true Granite Josh!

this week i say:

Well life has been just lovely so far on my unearned vacation. i’ve been sunning, exploring, chasing rainbows, shooting photos along the way. Slowing to a snail’s pace after running amok in San Diego hasn’t been easy, but i can say i’m adjusting quite well to the calm 3 weeks in.

rainbow-waimea

It’s been a pleasure not blowing my hair dry, applying a face of makeup, and foregoing showers some days. Don’t worry, i still shave and paint my toes. You know i’ve never believed in deodorant to begin with.

So it seems there’s a return to simplicity theme prevalent in my travels, and also, a return to that which is natural (like– REALLY natural). i decided when i landed here that i would quit the sleeping pills i’ve popped for 3 years. after 3 weeks, i can sleep a full night through, unassisted.

While i never considered myself an alcoholic, i was consuming at least 3 (work related) beers per day in San Diego. i’ve had 4 since stepping off the plane.

This is major, people! Feelin’ pretty swell.

Thanks for reading, and continue to follow as i lead journeys of other kinds. Although life in SD might have provided more explicit blogging material, a break from the norm is good. Right?

Thanks for reading,

granite sand

(LAST WEEK’S POST)

The only brewpub in Kauai happens to be walking distance from my house. And really, there is nothing else a person can walk to save for the beach on this remote part of the island. Figures.

A big Saturday night indeed, we pulled into Waimea Brewing Company at 9:30pm to a packed parking lot of about 10 cars. Inside we sat at the bar, and of 6 or so house brews i chose the porter. Dark roasted malts and coffee flavor, i’d declare it a 6 out of 10 on the awesome scale.

i was curious to meet some locals, so i chatted the bartender.

‘do you have a computer?’ i asked.

‘No.’

‘Well, i hear people’s hard drives crash out here all the time because of the humidity. Have you heard about this or know what i can do?’

‘That’s crazy, i’ve never heard of that.’

hmmm.

‘Do you live in Kekaha?

‘Yeah.’

‘Living here is SO interesting!’

‘What’s interesting?’ he said with a tinge of strife.

‘Oh, i dunno…’ (gesturing around with my hands) ‘Everything is interesting!’ hearty laughs on my behalf.

This man does not like me and thinks i was making fun of his culture.

‘So my landlord was telling me there’s some chicken traps we can get. To capture the chickens and roosters and take them to the humane society?’

‘We just shoot them. No one cares enough about chickens to drive them to the humane society.’

‘Yeah,’ i said. ‘i didn’t think that sounded right… Can i sample the red ale?’

bartender, and everyone else looked at me like i was crazy. In a shot glass he poured me a taste.

‘Have you ever had Luau Leaf soup?’ i asked.

‘No, but at parties and Luaus, we usually have Taro leaf sauces, mostly with squid, or chicken.’

‘i totally want to go to one of these parties! How do i get in?’

No response…

there has to be a list i can get on. i’ll look into it this week.

thanks for reading,

granite.

(LAST POST)

i actually wrote a farewell blog on my way out of town, but for some reason decided not to post it right away. The last two weeks i spent in San Diego were far from a treat. In that time, i pried the pen from my hands and threw it out the window before San Diego ‘The Chapter’ had been written. i suppose i struggle with untidy endings, and i’m not even sure this classifies as one. Leaving my home, losing my car and saying goodbye to loved ones was anti-climatic, unresolved, and not how i drafted the story at all.

i re-read that never-to-be-posted blog entry tonight, glad that it’s just another icon in my documents folder. If you’re wondering why saysgranite has been inactive for a month, it’s because i prefer not to present myself as a whiny wimp. That silly farewell letter is a tired inventory of all the struggles that didn’t end in my favor; bitter account after account of all the ‘failures;’ and finally, how leaving San Diego was the ultimate, losersome move.

The build-up to departure was surreal. It wasn’t until the last two weeks of August that i actually realized i was leaving, and set out to spend time with the people dearest to me. One night i was out with a friend, having a grand time like so many before, when i realized my luck… Personally and professionally, my mid 20s were pretty kick ass times, thanks to living in SD. Suddenly the end wasn’t reading so sad.

Granted, it’s not like the end to my life in North Park was the end of my life entirely. When most people hit rock bottom, moving to Hawaii isn’t exactly high on the list of options.

Given this grand opportunity, i scaled down three years worth of possessions to two 45 pound bags, one piece of carry-on luggage, and my computer bag.

A wise man told me, ‘people pay thousands of dollars for this kind of treatment.’ So there it is. i’m treating myself to a break, and focusing on where i’ll land after this segment wraps.

Ellipsis is more accurate than End…

thanks for reading,

granite.

blog look

(LAST ENTRY)

It’s what we eat to smile, and what we cry into when we’re sad. Ice cream: not the entire focus of my latest gastro-adventure, but close enough. San Diego’s greatest frozen desserts, oh my… where to start in a year round summer city? Like most projects, i started on the internets, then moved on to the pre-screening phone call process. Says granite, ‘So the sorbet is made in-house?’ Says Quietly ‘no.’

CLICK!

i just spent 6 hours all about town dropping ice cream like Hunter S. did acid. In a sugar-high fog, final stop number 8 yielded lost keys, tow truck drivers and some new friends (a three part sequence common to several of my flavorful misadventures). Says my talented photographer as we wait for AAA (an extra few minutes because i gave the wrong cross street), ‘oh, it’s never a dull moment…’

Yeah. No matter how cold the adventure, i try to keep things hot.

Thanks for reading,

granite.

In my humble opinion, ice cream is best enjoyed with super hot male company.

(LAST WEEK’S POST)

Oy! i am tired. It’s been another full week of fantastically awful food and beverage consumption. Monday at Toronado was all about the Chimay (there’s soemthing wickedly delightful about ordering a 9 dollar draft for 3 bucks every Monday). Last weekend’s San Diego International Beer Festival at the County Fair was another stellar event… Keep your eyes peeled for my upcoming article on SDNN.com highlighting some of the winners. Jesus, there were 311 beers to choose from! i drank a lot (shocking), and consequently macked a lot of fat kid food. Ice cream bars, fried zuccini… i’ll stop there.

And now a fun filled weekend celebrating what it is to be an unemployed, but independent (debatable) American. i’ll be drinking beer before most of your sorry asses are out of bed at FM 94.9’s live broadcast from Stone World Bistro and Gardens. Tastings every hour starting at 9am- for 94 cents! i might not wear underwear!

This 4th of July i thought, why battle crowds at booze free beaches when i can stay in my neighborhood, ride my bike to my favorite brewpub, and drink some of my favorite beers. At Blind Lady this Saturday and Sunday, Alesmith beers are the feature, with 7 brews on tap. For those of you living under a rock, Alesmith won ‘Small Brewing Company of the Year’ at the Great American Beer Festival last year and produces my current favorite, Speedway Stout. YES!

And so it seems i just cannot get away from beer. Have a great holiday weekend, i know i will. Belch.

thanks for reading,

granite.

(LAST WEEK’s POST)

Pizza has always had a special place in my heart. Before i was born, my grandparents owned a pizza house in Orange County. Throughout my life Nana made us pizza at least once a week. If i try hard enough, i can still taste her pie; twice baked dough, crunchy with a little chew, basic tomato sauce, dried oregano, mozzarella and thick cut pepperoni. Bella.

In high school, my first job was working at a pizzeria. i loved making pies, eating pies, and yes, playing grab ass with boys in the walk-in freezer.

When i first started this blog, i was interested in doing a story on pizza pies in San Diego. i was amazed at how many fine pizza establishments there are in San Diego, and so began a week-long binge in search of the best… by the end of the experiment i was fat, angry, gassy, and in overall gastrointestinal distress. And somehow a sun-dried tomato wound up in the ignition of my car!

You can read that initial blog post here:

http://www.saysgranite.com/2008/10/

i’m a dedicated woman, people.

Lots of exciting news this week in pizza; Lefty’s Chicago Pizza opened their Mission Hills location, and Pizzeria Luigi’s second store is located 3 doors down from Livewire on El Cajon Boulevard in North Park.

Take a gander at some of the first photos you’ll see of both new establishments. And of course pay them a visit for a slice or two!

Thanks for reading,

granite.

(LAST WEEK’S POST)

It’s that time again… another exciting week in beer. i love me some Allagash, and recently, i’ve been seeing more and more taps around town besides the usuals (Curieux and White). The first time I tried Allagash Black was a month or so ago at Jaynes Gastropub; what a crafty concept- a Belgian style porter? All i love about both styles of beer marry in this seamless, flavorful brew.

This past weekend i was excited to walk in unexpectly to an Allagash party at Blind Lady Ale House, and now Wednesday night at Neighborhood will again celebrate one of the best craft breweries in the nation.

Here i am doing a preview tasting… life is rough.

The morning after, especially.

Thanks for reading,

granite.

(PREVIOUS ENTRY)

i am sick of shit in its many forms. i do not like stepping in it. This week is about cleaning up.

Thanks for reading,

granite.

(LAST WEEK’S POST)

Monday was wild. I took a fantastic trip to Hollywood with my partner in crime, the talented photographer and trouble maker, Mr. Edwin Real. We celebrated with a late-night meal in Little Tokyo; Kama, short ribs with daikon root, grilled asparagus, and some tuna in a phlegm-like mountain potato paste that neither of us could choke down after one courtesy bite. ‘You have some hanging from your chin.’ Laughter abound.

At 1:20am Mr. Real was returned to his car in the condition i found him. In North Park, i settled at my desk to read a hard copy of Mutineer Magazine. OK, to read my article in Mutineer Magazine. Shit, i drove to Hollywood to get my hands on a copy before it officially hits newsstands June 3rd. Read my entry ‘Hollywood Recap’ for the, well, recap (right over there ——>>>>>>). Let it serve as a preface to the online article in Mutineer on pages 49-52 (June/July) issue. Please and thank you.

Tuesday was off to a rough start, but my spirits lifted quickly at the sight of a rather nice and kindly edited feature on SDNN.com’s home page: 8 Great San Diego Microbrews. Read, enjoy, and post your comments to SDNN’s website.

i popped into Blind Lady Ale House for a beer, and to drop off an early issue of Mutineer. Swinging open the front door, i entered San Diego’s craft brewing vortex. i avoided composing that email all day. i dreaded the words that failed to appear in ‘compose mail.’ And there he was, right there, drinking an Automatic #1. A conversation better had in person, i thought so anyways. Check in later for the complete story.

It was a good day overall. i ate my lunch at the Embarcadero and reflected on how much i love San Diego. i snapped a couple photos. Sitting quietly in the sun, i looked off at Coronado, behind me at Little Italy’s high rises; a smile as someone reeled in a fish.

Sound like i have a sensitive side? Fuck that noise.

Thanks for reading.

granite.

Says Granite